


Sing Your Tears

by Althecynth



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Based on Kingsman 2 trailer, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confession, M/M, Marriage, Requited Love, Unrequited Love, end of Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-09
Packaged: 2018-10-29 21:50:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10862790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Althecynth/pseuds/Althecynth
Summary: After discovering that Harry had been alive all this time, Merlin confronts him without Eggsy there to witness it.





	Sing Your Tears

**Author's Note:**

> This is simply a passing idea of mine since the trailer's release. I didn't have the urge to write this until now since I wasn't sure how to start posting stories on AO3 for the first time. This isn't Brit-picked or has been betaed but, hey, simply a passing idea. :D

Merlin wasn't sure how long he and Harry had stared at one another in this white, dull room the latter was placed in nor was he going to bother guessing. Time had stopped the moment they met eye to eye. Merlin's were calculating and held a tremendous amount of hidden force that was fiercer than the disciplinary vibe he wore when facing recruits or his department and only used against situations he didn't like. Harry's, even if it's his remaining eye, was equally emitting the same although it had a strong bitter coldness reflected outwards to the man in front. 

 

A trained person would be able to notice the way his hands had gripped on the bedsheets for restraint and took it as a small sense of comfort to keep one from losing themselves. But it was hard to tell if it was already too late for that. This man was Harry Hart. But still someone else entirely who had a written message on his expression saying: I can kill you here, you know.

 

The long tail of silence went on for a moment before Harry spoke.

 

"He's not with you?" No one needn't to specify who he was referring to.

 

"It'd be troublesome for him to see you right now. Finding out the truth was already too much for him to handle."

 

Harry nodded. "I suppose you're right. Considering what I've also said to him before leaving and never apologising was cruel of me." He looked down at his hands and stayed that way. Perhaps, recalling the heated argument he had with Eggsy. 

 

It was a struggle to keep the young man from running into this room. He spat threats and fought with anyone who were pulling him down from teaching the door until Merlin took it upon himself to order him to stay on watch and away from their prisoner lest he be shipped back to London and restricted from his possessions until he was able to behave. It hurt both of them to hear the word "prisoner" said so forced but firmly just to prove a point. However, it hurt even more seeing those bright green eyes harden with spite and anger when he said "Fuck you" then stomped away. He knows how much Eggsy cares about the ones he loves and how easily they can destroy him and Merlin is scared of what could happen.

 

Merlin allowed himself to think about it but didn't see a reason to be quiet. ”You didn't like apologising to begin with, anyway. Always had to be stubborn to think that you're right even when I rub the obvious all over your face. Not very gentlemanly now, is it?"

 

It wasn't like he was expecting a reply. Like he was told, Harry doesn't say much any more than he thinks is required. So he just watched the man watching his hands then whispers, "He misses you. We all have." 

 

His body flinched when Harry scoffed. "I seem to be looking at another pathway about this. Last time I checked, there wasn't a search party sent out to retrieve a one-eyed man."

 

"Last time I checked, we had a leader for a traitor revealed the next few hours and had a megalomaniac ready to end everything which demanded all hands on deck to stop him within the same day. " Merlin retorted. They were back in the game of the blinking contest as they regarded one another with similar strength. Harry had already stopped holding on anything and was slowly standing, quivering with barely suppressed fury and his lips twitching while he searched himself for a shape of his control to refrain from raising his voice. While it could have brought joy to the Scot when he finally said his name, all he heard was disdain laced in carefully measured words.

 

"I did what needed to be done, Merlin. Poppy may have brought shit terror around you and everyone else, but her objective to give lost bodies hope, receives my utmost respect."

 

"She sent a missile to HQ and to the shop."

 

"It's your own fault to miss it-"

 

"Which killed so many of our friends, colleagues and also hundreds of families that had nothing to do with it! A neighborhood that mostly consisted of elders and children - all killed! Tell me, Harry, how many 'lost bodies' have given you the 'hope' she oh-so seeks?!" 

 

Harry was slightly taken by surprise by Merlin's outburst. He's never heard the man glower and so much as yell that loud since their tenure. Ever. He can see the other's face redden and note that there was sweat starting to gradually gather on his bald head. It would have been funny. It would have.

 

"To achieve a cause requires sacrifices. Wasn't it the same with Kingsman? Surely Eggsy would understand-"

 

"Don't you fucking dare bring him into this, you asshole."

 

"I was his mentor." Harry said, unaffected by the growing accent the Scot had to hold in. "He was aware right from the start that doing good didn't always mean being good."

 

"Aye..." Merlin huffed, finally giving in to his real Scottish tone. "Aye, he knew what being a Kingsman entailed but he did'nae see any point to allow anyone as crazy as that bitch to let people die for a vision that only brings more lives on the line. I'm starting to praise him for being smarter than you. He has the potential you saw in him and it's nowhere close to what you say you understand. You can't claim to know him because you don't."

 

Something in Harry snapped. His jaw tightened and his hands curled into fists. He was showing signs of fighting Merlin but the other held his ground. Although, it was dangerous to not take a hint, Merlin is as lethal as Harry Hart. It was appalling, really, but he just noticed a shining object around the former agent's left hand until it zeroed onto his fingers and saw it. 

 

A ring.

 

Merlin froze. His shocked expression was also caught on Harry until he realised what had done it.

 

"You're not married." Merlin murmured which sounded much like a statement. Harry was never married. In relationships, yes, but never married.

 

Harry gazed at his ring and straightened his shoulders nonchalantly. "I wasn't always a prisoner since coming here. I had to maintain an identity and citizenship to stay."

 

It finally dawned on Merlin on what was going on. How Harry had survived, how he came to actually walk and simply exist in the States, and how he was acquainted to Poppy.

 

"You're fucking her."

 

"Now that sounds mightily offensive-"

 

Merlin doesn't spare him anyone chance of coming back on. "You were gone for two years without using your aliases or detecting the government's suspicions because you were given refuge by a maniac and later decided to support her ideals and play house?"

 

Merlin didn't want to believe this but his gut was weeping to him in sympathy, regretting to admit that it was true. His gut doesn't lie. For once, he was religious enough to pray that it was wrong. Please be wrong... For the boy's sake.

 

Harry's face, unfortunately, did not offer anything to end his thoughts with an honest Amen. "I would rather say that we are legally committed and have presented as man and woman in front of an altar. But, to humor you, yes. I am fucking her."

 

It was strange. For the first time in Merlin's entire life, he wanted to kill this man. The man he enjoys teasing with almost anything he can wittily backfire at, the man who had issues with his curls and complained that being bald was more convenient (when it's sometimes not), the man who he shares gossips and gambles with even on the field and yet still be the only one reprimanded by Chester King because the geezer is secretly frightened of the Scot, the man who's his dearest best friend and also the only thing the boy he's madly in love with only sees. It was that last thought that drove Merlin to land a very hard punch on Harry, square on the face, and stilled when the man dropped on the floor, his right hand vibrating from the impact of his hit.

 

He watched as Harry brought his hand to his bloodied nose and look up at him to meet venomous eyes.

 

"He cried on his own for more than half the year you were gone. He fought his new life tooth and nail to keep going just to feel enough to believe that he did you proud. He dusted and vacuumed your home until it disappeared in the attack. When he's asleep, he'd call your name and then wake up only to cry all over again and repeat everything. He was the only one who knew you needed to be found because he trusted you for your word to come back. He loved you, Harry. He still does. And you did nothing to acknowledge a wonderful young man who loved you but give up and turn to a whore who spreads her legs that is using you to get what she needs until you're nothing to her."

 

If his words had gained him a hurt reaction from Harry, it didn't matter. Because he had made his choice and his choice was Poppy. Merlin stood straighter than before and turned and started to walk away. There was nothing left to bring his best friend back. He lost him two years ago. 

 

"I love him..." He could hear Harry clear enough to stop on his tracks but not looking back. "I love him... Knowing that was what kept me alive. Not her." It quenched on Merlin's heart to hear this. He cannot understand why does he say so yet will not leave the woman and help them even for the boy. Guess he'll never know. But he has to get his message across him.

 

Merlin said over his shoulder, "These past two years was hard for us, too. But Eggsy was stronger than any of us." He was reluctant to go on but he recalled the young man's mischievous eyes, those kissable lips, his cheeky air and selfless heart. He met Harry's eye. "And I love him, Harry... so, so much. I wish you could see how lucky you are to have him return his feelings to you."

 

Merlin doesn't wait for Harry to say more and leaves. He doesn't stop walking until he gets to the other side of the building and enters his room only to find Eggsy on his bed, quietly sleeping on his creased dress shirt and slacks, and curled into a protective ball. His coat was laid neatly on the couch's arm rest while his Oxfords were hidden under the bed. 

 

It warmed yet pained the Scot to witness something so simple but endearing. Coming a bit closer, he can see Eggsy's nose scrunch in instinct of an intruder but Merlin knows for a fact that the lad was exhausted and too tired to react on time. Still, he smiled when the smaller body relaxed on his arms as they wrapped themselves around him as of it could tell that the other individual was no threat.

 

Merlin ran his hands on those familiar blonde locks and gazed lovingly when Eggsy leaned closer to it. A frown came to his face when he saw fresh tears drying from the boy's eyes. Gently, he wiped them off and was all "Fuck it" when he then planted a kiss on the forehead - the closest intimacy he can ever allow himself. Eggsy squirmed a little and whimpered.

 

"Harry..."

 

A thin line formed on Merlin's lips. This had happened before but it didn't mean it hurt less. He continued to stroke Eggsy's hair and placed more daring kisses on this gorgeous creature, anyway. His mind drifted to where they are and what had become of them. They will need to reform their plan to take... Poppy Hart down. Speaking to Harry did not make a difference to saving the world but it did end a long term friendship, something he will surely need to explain to Eggsy. He's not confident on how to tell him or how to leave some parts alone but he knew that it will break the lad if he was lied to but more when he's told the truth. 

 

Merlin kisses Eggsy one more time.

 

"Everything will be fine, lad. I'll take care of everything." A newly awoken power took over him, his resolve growing as he listens to Eggsy breathing. He finally let's himself cry for the first time since coming to Kentucky, silent enough to avoid rousing the boy awake. He thought he would cry for a friend he lost, but now, these tears are for the person sleeping within his arms. 

 

"I promise."


End file.
